https://www.bible.com/events/49215060
Church of the Nazarene – Harrisonburg
Healing Fractured Relationships, Part 3: Rejection
No one can ever reject you as powerfully as God accepts you.
Welcome to our journey into a series we are calling “Healing Fractured Relationships”. Together we are seeking the Lord’s wisdom and guidance for our relationships: all relationships. Why? Because all relationships matter.
Whoever those people are that matter most to you, that’s who we are talking about today and in the weeks to come. And most specifically, we are talking about relationships in our lives that are hurting.
Each week, as we talk about relationships, we will talk about specific tools that can help us. God’s Word has truth for us, tools for us, regarding our relationships, especially those that are hurting.
Every single person knows something of today’s topic: rejection.
If you were to call to mind a time when you were rejected, there is probably still an ache associated with that.
But take heart, early on in your Bibles, not far from the very beginning, is one of the most profound cases of rejection in history.
It’s the story of a man named Joseph.
Genesis 37:17-28
“They have moved on from here,” the man answered. “I heard them say, ‘Let’s go to Dothan.’ ” So Joseph went after his brothers and found them near Dothan. But they saw him in the distance, and before he reached them, they plotted to kill him. “Here comes that dreamer!” they said to each other. “Come now, let’s kill him and throw him into one of these cisterns and say that a ferocious animal devoured him. Then we’ll see what comes of his dreams.” When Reuben heard this, he tried to rescue him from their hands. “Let’s not take his life,” he said. “Don’t shed any blood. Throw him into this cistern here in the wilderness, but don’t lay a hand on him.” Reuben said this to rescue him from them and take him back to his father. So when Joseph came to his brothers, they stripped him of his robe—the ornate robe he was wearing— and they took him and threw him into the cistern. The cistern was empty; there was no water in it. As they sat down to eat their meal, they looked up and saw a caravan of Ishmaelites coming from Gilead. Their camels were loaded with spices, balm and myrrh, and they were on their way to take them down to Egypt. Judah said to his brothers, “What will we gain if we kill our brother and cover up his blood? Come, let’s sell him to the Ishmaelites and not lay our hands on him; after all, he is our brother, our own flesh and blood.” His brothers agreed. So when the Midianite merchants came by, his brothers pulled Joseph up out of the cistern and sold him for twenty shekels of silver to the Ishmaelites, who took him to Egypt.
Joseph’s brothers sell him into slavery and fabricate a lie to tell their father Joseph was killed by a wild animal.
Chapter 37 concludes with one final farewell note.
“Meanwhile, the Midianites sold Joseph in Egypt to Potiphar, one of Pharaoh’s officials, the captain of the guard.”
Rejected. Sent away unwanted. For Joseph’s brothers, this rejection seemed final.
But rejection was not final for Joseph, because man’s rejection does not equal God’s rejection.
It’s important to acknowledge what we are experiencing physically, mentally and emotionally when we feel rejection.
Data suggests that our brains interpret rejection like we would actual physical pain. Our bodies are hardwired to respond to rejection.
But with the pain of rejection, researchers have found that the pain is ‘re-lived’ over and over. The body and brain can respond multiple times over and over in a similar way as that emotional pain is experienced again and again. Rejection, quite literally, hurts.
It can cause our minds to fill with negative emotions, like guilt or shame.
We have thoughts like:
‘I’m not worthy’
‘I’m broken or flawed. No one could love me.’
‘I always mess up. I’m never enough.’
We have to acknowledge these negative thoughts and emotions, but if we get stuck there then we are often blinded to God’s truth.
Somewhere in the life of Joseph, he made a difficult but life-changing decision. We don’t know exactly when, but it’s clear somewhere along the way he decided to trust God in the midst of his hurt.
The hurt and pain of a rejection so unthinkable was real for him, but in spite of that, he chose to trust God’s promises.
Genesis 41:39-40
Then Pharaoh said to Joseph, “Since God has made all this known to you, there is no one so discerning and wise as you. You shall be in charge of my palace, and all my people are to submit to your orders. Only with respect to the throne will I be greater than you.”
Genesis 50:15-21
When Joseph’s brothers saw that their father was dead, they said, “What if Joseph holds a grudge against us and pays us back for all the wrongs we did to him?” So they sent word to Joseph, saying, “Your father left these instructions before he died: ‘This is what you are to say to Joseph: I ask you to forgive your brothers the sins and the wrongs they committed in treating you so badly.’ Now please forgive the sins of the servants of the God of your father.” When their message came to him, Joseph wept. His brothers then came and threw themselves down before him. “We are your slaves,” they said. But Joseph said to them, “Don’t be afraid. Am I in the place of God? You intended to harm me, but God intended it for good to accomplish what is now being done, the saving of many lives. So then, don’t be afraid. I will provide for you and your children.” And he reassured them and spoke kindly to them.
Joseph’s life could have been so much different, right?
Rejection could have ruled him, instead, redemption did.
Jesus Himself understood what it was to be rejected.
Isaiah 53:1-3
Who has believed our message and to whom has the arm of the Lord been revealed? He grew up before him like a tender shoot, and like a root out of dry ground. He had no beauty or majesty to attract us to him, nothing in his appearance that we should desire him. He was despised and rejected by mankind, a man of suffering, and familiar with pain. Like one from whom people hide their faces he was despised, and we held him in low esteem.
God has a way of turning rejection into redemption.Jesus, the rejected one, is now in the glory of Heaven, with you on His mind.
One of the reasons the story of Joseph is one of the most significant in the Old Testament: in this life, the rejectors don’t get the last word.
“Every ounce of rejection you have faced was God grabbing your shoulders, positioning you into the proper direction, and moving you forward.”
Amy Klutinoty
The bottom line:
No one on can ever reject you as powerfully as God accepts you.
Verses for further study/reflection:
1 Peter 2:4
Psalm 34:17-20
John 15:18
Psalm 27:10
Psalm 94:14
Isaiah 53:3
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