u joined us last week you are aware that we began a new series entitled, “RELATIONSHIP GOALS” For some of us that was a new concept. Today we will take a look at “FAMILY GOALS”
The word “family” alone could evoke a wide variety of responses in all of us.
From Thankfulness to Anx. Delight to grief.
The mere mention may bring tears of joy. Or tears of hurt.
I have a disclaimer – Pastor Kevin did not invite me to bring this message because the Kohl family has it all figured out, I don’t have it mastered as a mom, wife, sister or daughter. Often when I get the opportunity to share, the message is to deepen me.
And I am pretty sure, the reason I was given this topic is because we are uniquely in the throws of parenting. PICTURE of my family.
Here is a PICTURE of my family. My college sweetheart and husband of 27 years, Our oldest daughter Gwenna – she is a freshman at Liberty. Eli is a sophomore at East Rock. And Ivy is 4 and in Preschool.
I would not want you to get distracted trying to figure out just how old I was when our youngest was born – I was 44. And for those of you who love statistics, there is only a 2-3% chance of two 44 years olds to have a child naturally – even less when being prevented. NOW THAT THAT’S CLEARED UP. I will say I call that our “ONLY GOD” story.
And though we would have never imagined that surprise in our family – we have seen the goodness of God. I remind you that the same powerful God is at work in your life and in your families – not to bring you all babies in your old age but to meet the needs you may not even know you have.
Last week Pastor Kevin shared that just as the world was created, we see how the Lord Places us, Provides for us, gives us purpose, gives parameters, and is the place we find our IDENTITY.
Our goal should be abandoning any image of myself that God doesn’t say about me.
This is KEY to any healthy, vibrant relationship!
What is a family?
Family – a group of people who are related to each other, including parents, children, and close relatives. – Oxford dictionary
Another source defines it as
family, a group of persons united by the ties of marriage, blood, or adoption, constituting a single household and interacting with each other in their respective social positions, usually those of spouses, parents, children, and siblings.
Marriage and family are Gods institutions. God created the family when he made the first man and woman – telling them to be fruitful and multiply in Genesis 1:28
God wastes no time developing marriage and family. Marriage is a foundational unit of society.
Shortly after , we see sin enter the scene. Self-sufficiency enters and so does family disfunction.
The effects of sin, destroy families and society – wreak havoc, create unimaginable suffering, leading many to a Christless society and life.
In Genesis 4, we meet Cain and Abel, Adam and Eve’s first and second born son.
In Genesis 4:3-5, God favors Abels offering over Cains
Then the Lord said to Cain, “Why are you angry? Why is your face downcast? If you do what is right, will you not be accepted? But if you do not do what is right, sin is crouching at your door; it desires to have you, but you must rule over it.”
Genesis 4:6-7
Now Cain said to his brother Abel, “Let’s go out to the field.”[a] While they were in the field, Cain attacked his brother Abel and killed him.
Genesis 4:8
Then Cain ran away to avoid punishment – creating yet more challenge and hurt.
This is not to discourage, but to remind us that as soon as sin entered so did the battle against and with family.
Though today’s challenges likely look different than God giving favor to one offering over another – Jealousy is a hurt that still reigns as destructive. The family is in battle.
Life, Hope, Truth.com research reveals that the some of the greatest or top THREATS that come against our families today are:
Materialism – keeping our families focused on acquiring more and more – and our children believing that material possessions are where happiness is.
Secularism – 25% of Americans claim no religious affiliation
Compared to 6% in 1991
Negative Media Influence – not only bringing constant unwholesome influence, but keeping families from interacting.
But we all know, the ultimate enemy is not a physical enemy but a spiritual one – satan himself.
1 Peter 5:8-9 tells us
Be alert and of sober mind. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour. 9 Resist him, standing firm in the faith, because you know that the family of believers throughout the world is undergoing the same kind of sufferings.
Why is this?
This quote by John Pale sums it up for me:
“God designed the family to fill the earth with His glory” -John Pale
Let’s visit our brother Joseph to see how this played out in his family. His story takes up 14 chapters in Genesis – so though I would love to read it all to you this morning – I better just give you a quick summary…
Joseph – Genesis 37-50
Summary of the life of joseph
- Favored son:
Jacob openly favored Joseph, giving him a special coat, which further fueled his brother’s resentment.
- Prophetic dreams:
Joseph had dreams where his family bowed down to him, which he interpreted as a sign of future power, further angering his brothers.
- Sold into slavery:
Due to jealousy, Joseph’s brothers sold him to traders who took him to Egypt where he was sold to Potiphar, an Egyptian official.
- False accusation and imprisonment:
When Joseph resisted the advances of Potiphar’s wife, she falsely accused him of rape, leading to his imprisonment.
- Interpreting dreams:
While in prison, Joseph gained a reputation for accurately interpreting dreams, including those of the Pharaoh’s cupbearer and baker.
- Ruling Egypt:
Pharaoh, troubled by a dream, summoned Joseph to interpret it, which revealed a coming famine. Impressed by Joseph’s wisdom, Pharaoh appointed him as second in command, allowing him to prepare Egypt for the famine by storing grain.
- Reunion with family:
During the famine, Joseph’s brothers came to Egypt to buy food, and he revealed himself to them, ultimately forgiving them and reuniting with his family.
- Throughout Genesis 37-50, Joseph’s story showcases his reliance on God: despite being sold into slavery by his brothers, falsely accused, and imprisoned.
- His forgiveness of his brothers in Genesis 45: is a powerful example of how he trusted God’s plan even when faced with betrayal.
The Lord was with Joseph, and he became a successful man, and he was in the house of his Egyptian master. His master saw that the Lord was with him and that the Lord caused all that he did to succeed in his hands. Genesis 39:2-3
In the Bible, Joseph turned to God in family trouble by trusting in God’s sovereignty and forgiving his brothers1. Sold into slavery by his brothers, Joseph eventually rose to become the second most powerful man in Egypt and provided food for Egypt and his own family during a severe famine2
When you are asked to speak on family, you naturally reflect on your own.
My parents divorced when I was 2 – when I was around 3 or 4 my stepmom entered the family. When I was 13, my only child life ended as my beautiful fabulous sister entered the world, though I did not always think that when she was 2 and I was 15!
Early on labeled my family as my “happy dysfunction”. If you know me well, you know, I like things to be pretty and tied up with a bow.
But the truth of the matter the division of my family and all of its circumstances were not always happy. My pretty bow was often removed or pushed to the side.
Here in the midst of these family circumstances is where I discovered that I needed Jesus.
I was desperate for him – his care, his comfort, his truth, his constant presence, his strength, his love, his grace, HIS ALL.
I am thankful for my story because it brought me to Jesus.
Do you let the story of your family take you to Jesus?
Whether it is the story of your youth, memories, or the moments you are living right now.
Whether you are from a family of Godly heritage – do you let your story lead and keep you in Jesus?
Whether you had a story you would have preferred to be different, do you let your story lead you to Jesus?
Regardless of our past stories and the ones we are currently living – there is a family goal that we can all choose.
Family Goal #1
Regardless of my family story and circumstances, I will let it take me to Jesus.
What does this look like Angela?
Story of laying on the floor praying when I had toddlers?
There is one other goal – I’m going to ask that we commit to together
Family Goal #2
Regardless of where my family is now, the future will be for God’s glory.
JOSEPHS STORY TELLS US ABOUT OUR FAMILY DIRECTION CHANGING WITH JESUS
I know that my family’s tomorrow can be different because of Jesus and it starts with me.
This is not about you taking more control of your family, but surrendering it to God. This doesn’t mean by choosing Jesus that everything will be easy, but I promise your trajectory will be better – because you will be different in Him.
Your part is surrender
Your part is trust
Your part is
Your part is to be unrelenting light.
We need to hear this – ALL GOALS REQUIRE GODS HELP!
Psalm 121 tells us – My help comes from the Lord the maker of heaven and earth.
The same helper that came along side of me as a child, has and continues to be the one who helps me as the mama of my 3 babies. Helps me as a, sister, daughter.
Mention Davids return?
Use COURAGEOUS VIDEO – SUMMARIZE!
So, I invite us to commit to these goals together as the FAMILY of God
(these goals apply to this family as well… )
Family Goal #1
Regardless of my family story and circumstances, I will let it take me to Jesus.
Family Goal #2
Regardless of where my family is now, the future will be for God’s glory.
And now, what are your personal goals for your family?
Pastor Kevin asked me this same question this week as we discussed this weeks message.
Here are the goals that were on my heart
Angela’s Family Goals:
- I will be as hip and lively when Ivy is 18 as I am now when Gwenna is 18!
- Each of us would know and love Jesus deeply and personally.
- We will love one another well and reflect Christ, starting at home.
- My kids will always want to come home.
- Our family will be light and draw others to Jesus.
What about you this morning? Will you bring your stories to Jesus?
Will you join me in seeking Family Goals for your family?
Grandmas, Grandpas, Mom, Dad, Single parent, step parent, Teen, Sister, Brother, son, daughter – what are your goals this morning.
We have cards all around the room on the alters, on the tables,
Come seek the Lord with me for your family as we “run to the Father”